Have you ever felt stuck or frustrated trying to get what you want—whether it’s a promotion, a new job, or a solution to a tough problem? Of course, you have. We all hit those walls from time to time. And if you're in a leadership role, those challenges can feel like a daily—or even hourly—occurrence.

So why do some people seem to move through these obstacles more easily, even when the challenges are complex and nonstop?

More often than not, it comes down to one thing: their network.

The most successful leaders I know intentionally cultivate a broad, diverse network—and they strengthen the relationships and use the network regularly. They’re not just collecting business cards or LinkedIn connections. They genuinely show up for others, offering ideas, introductions, and support. And they aren’t afraid to ask for help or advice when needed because a strong network creates a win-win situation.

I often get pushback when I talk to leaders about networking. A lot of people reject the idea outright. Why? Because networking has a bad reputation for feeling transactional, inauthentic, or just… slimy. We’ve all met the person who networks purely to get something, but that’s not the kind of network I’m talking about.

The best networks are built on mutual respect, shared curiosity, and a desire to help each other grow. They’re energizing, not exhausting. The quality of your thinking improves when you’re in regular conversation with people who challenge, inspire, and support you. That leads to better decisions, actions, and, ultimately, better results.

But here’s the thing: these relationships take intentionality. And time flies.

How many times have you thought, Oh, I should reach out to [so-and-so]… only to realize it’s been years? I’ve been there. A question comes up that I know a colleague could help with, but it’s been so long that I hesitate. Will they think I’m just using them? Will they be annoyed I haven’t stayed in touch?

Sometimes, I don’t reach out. And I miss a unique perspective or insight that could get me the outcome I want. 

When I do reach out—and I’m honest about it—it almost always goes better than I expect. I’ll say, Hey, I know it’s been a while, and I’m sorry about that. I’ve always appreciated our connection, and I’d love your insight on something if you’re open to it. Nine times out of ten, they’re relieved. They haven’t reached out either! And now, we both get a chance to reconnect.

You might be wondering, other than formal networking events, how do you intentionally cultivate your network? A networking tool I’ve come to love is Fika.  

I learned about Fika while working at Boeing with a Swedish boss. We were building a new business, and he suggested we start weekly “Fikas” to nurture relationships across the team. I didn’t know what it was at first—but I quickly learned.

Fika is a cherished Swedish tradition, simply taking regular, intentional breaks to connect. It’s coffee, conversation, and connection. We made it part of our weekly routine, and the results were incredible: stronger relationships, more creativity, better collaboration, and ultimately better business outcomes. It was simple and kind of magical. I still get feedback from people about how Fika made all the difference in promoting a positive, collaborative, creative culture with a sense of community and well-being that resulted in a successful business they are still proud of. 

Debbie and I talk more about the power of Fika on our April podcast episode, and we share how you can use it to strengthen your network, too. Fika works for individuals as well as organizations! 

Because, at the end of the day, a network with strong relationships is the secret sauce. Strong Relationships help us think better, lead better, and live better. And they’re worth the effort.

Want to learn more about networks and strong relationships? Our Elemental Leadership course provides information and tools to help you build and nurture relationships. You can access the course here JOIN THE WAIT LIST.

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